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Christian Beliefs about Life and Death » Love, Sex and Relationships in Christianity

What you'll learn this session

Study time: 30 minutes

Edexcel spec: Paper 1, 2.4 (Christianity)

What Christians teach about love (agape), including 1 Corinthians 13 and loving your neighbour
Why Christians see sexual relationships as a gift from God for uniting a couple and for having children
The different Christian views on sex outside marriage and on homosexuality
How humanists see sexual relationships and how Christians respond

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Love: the principle behind Christian relationships

The lesson Human Sexuality and Changing Relationships explained what human sexuality is, the purposes of sexual relationships and what humanists think about them. This lesson looks at what Christians teach, and why they do not all agree.

Key terms:

Agape: a Greek word for selfless, giving love that wants the best for another person, whatever it costs you.
Fornication: a traditional Christian word for sex between people who are not married to each other.
Chastity (recap from Contraception, Celibacy, Adoption and Fostering): keeping sexual behaviour within the limits of a person's Church teaching, for example by waiting until marriage.
Traditional teaching: the long-standing teaching of a Church, such as the Catholic Church and Orthodox Churches.
Liberal Christians: Christians who are more willing to read the Bible and Church teaching in the light of modern society.

Christians believe that God is love and that God made human beings to love. The New Testament uses the word agape for the highest kind of love. It is not mainly a feeling. It is a decision to care for someone and to put them first. Christians see Jesus as the best example, because he gave his life for others.

In 1 Corinthians 13, Paul describes this love. He says love is patient and kind, and that it is not jealous, boastful or rude. He ends by saying that faith, hope and love last, and that the greatest of these is love. Many Christians read this at weddings, because it shows the kind of love they want in a relationship.

You have met Jesus' two great commandments in earlier lessons. The second, love your neighbour as yourself, applies to relationships (Mark 12:31). For Christians, this means every relationship should show respect and care. Nobody should be used or treated as an object. This is the main principle that Christians apply to friendships, family life and sexual relationships.

Sexual relationships: a gift from God

Christians believe sexual relationships are a good gift from God, not something shameful. Most Christian teaching gives two main purposes.

💍 Uniting a couple

Genesis 2:24 says that a man and woman become "one flesh". Christians understand this as a deep bond. Sex expresses and strengthens love and trust between two people who have promised themselves to each other.

👶 Having children

In Genesis 1:28 God blesses human beings and tells them to have children. Christians believe that couples share in God's work of creation when they bring new life into the world.

Because sex is so important, many Christians teach that it belongs inside a lifelong commitment, which is marriage. They say this protects both partners from being hurt and gives any children a secure home. Hebrews 13:4 says that marriage should be honoured by everyone. The details of marriage are in the next lesson, Christian Marriage: Vows, Monogamy and Purposes.

Sex outside marriage

Christians hold different views here.

Traditional teaching. The Catholic Church, Orthodox Churches and many Protestant Churches teach that sex belongs only within marriage, and that sex outside marriage (fornication) is wrong. They point to 1 Corinthians 6:18-20, which warns against sexual wrongdoing and links it to the body belonging to God. They also say that waiting for marriage shows commitment and respect.
More liberal views. Some Christians and Churches accept that many couples form loving, committed relationships before they marry. They stress love, faithfulness and respect over the wedding itself. They also say that Jesus' teaching on agape is more important than a strict rule. Even so, most liberal Christians still say sex should never be casual or selfish.

Homosexuality

Homosexuality means being attracted to people of the same sex. Christians do not all agree about it, so you must be able to explain why.

📖 Traditional teaching

The Catholic Church teaches that being gay is not a sin, but that sexual acts between people of the same sex are not part of God's plan, because sex is for a man and woman in marriage and is open to children. It teaches that gay people must be treated with respect and compassion and are called to chastity. Many Orthodox and conservative Protestant Christians agree. They point to passages such as Romans 1:26-27 and Leviticus 18:22.

🤝 More liberal views

Other Christians and Churches welcome gay people fully and accept loving same-sex relationships. They say that Jesus' main command was to love, that he said nothing about homosexuality, and that the passages used against it come from a very different time and culture. Many Christians in between say the Church should keep its traditional teaching but treat everyone with love.

The Church of England is an example of this disagreement. It has long taught that sex belongs within marriage between a man and a woman, but its members hold a wide range of views and the Church has been debating the issue for years. Same-sex marriage itself is covered in the next lesson.

Humanist attitudes and Christian responses

Atheists do not believe in God, so they follow no religious rule about sex. Humanists are atheists (or agnostics) who base their ethics on reason and human needs. Most atheists and humanists say that a sexual relationship is a private choice between consenting adults, and that what matters is consent, respect and not harming anyone. They do not think marriage is needed, and they accept sex outside marriage and same-sex relationships if these rules are followed.

Christians respond in several ways:

Many agree that consent and respect matter, but say they are not enough. Sex also needs lasting commitment.
They say sex is more than pleasure. It joins two people deeply and may create new life, so it should not be treated lightly.
They argue that sex as a gift from God has a purpose, so believers should follow what God teaches.
Liberal Christians often agree with humanists that loving, faithful couples should be accepted, and they share the call for respect and equality.

Common mistakes

Saying all Christians think the same. Always give both the traditional and the liberal view.
Saying Christians dislike or reject gay people. Traditional teaching says people must be treated with respect, even where it does not accept same-sex relationships.
Thinking agape means romantic love. It is selfless love for anyone.
Writing "the Bible says" without naming a teaching. Name a passage or a Church.

Exam-style question

(a) Identify three Christian teachings about sexual relationships. [3 marks, AO1]

(b) Choose one religion. Outline two teachings about love in this religion. [4 marks, AO1]

(d) "Sex should only happen inside marriage." Evaluate this statement, showing you have considered different points of view. In your answer you should refer to at least one religion. [12 marks, AO1 and AO2]

Model answer

(a) 1. Sex is a gift from God (1). 2. Sex unites a couple (1). 3. Sex is a way of having children (1).

(b) Christianity. Christians teach agape, which is selfless love (1), because Jesus gave his life for others (1). Christians also teach "love your neighbour as yourself" (1), which means everyone should be treated with care and respect (1).

(c) The Catholic Church and other traditional Christians teach that sex outside marriage (fornication) is wrong, because sex is a gift from God for a married couple and for having children. They point to 1 Corinthians 6, which says the body belongs to God. However, more liberal Christians accept that a loving, faithful couple may be in a committed relationship before marriage. They say agape and respect matter more than a rule. So attitudes differ because Christians give different weight to Church tradition and to love. (Level 2: terms used well, contrasting views, developed reasons.)

(d) Plan. Agree: Christian teaching says sex unites a couple and may create children, so it needs lifelong commitment; Catholic and Orthodox teaching calls sex outside marriage wrong; marriage protects partners and children. Disagree: humanists say consent and respect are what matter; liberal Christians stress agape and accept committed couples; many people cohabit and are faithful. Possible conclusion: for Christians who follow traditional teaching, the statement is true, but not all Christians agree, and non-religious people would reject it. The statement is strongest when "should" means "for religious reasons".

Exam tip

In part (c), when the question says "different attitudes", write one paragraph for the traditional view and one for the liberal view, each with a reason.

Recap

Christians teach agape, selfless love, as shown in 1 Corinthians 13 and in loving your neighbour as yourself.
Sex is a gift from God for uniting a couple and for having children.
Traditional Christians teach sex belongs in marriage, while liberal Christians accept committed relationships.
Traditional teaching does not accept same-sex sexual acts but calls for respect, while liberal Christians accept loving same-sex relationships.
Atheists and humanists stress consent and respect, and Christians reply that sex also needs commitment and has a God-given purpose.

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